The Remorse of The Lost
by xxsoraskyninxx
Summary: The clashing and conflicted emotions inside the young honorary Britannian. How he felt when he witnessed his princess fall into a blood-crazed state and pulled the trigger against the Japanese; the elevens. How his heart shattered into a billion pieces when his eyes saw her limp and un-moving on the cold hard ground. A Suzaku x Euphemia one-shot.


_=Although I greatly dislike Suzaku x Euphemia (as it clashes against my OTP; Suzaku x Lelouch) I found that the feelings the two showed for each other were... Pretty obvious throughout the anime. I'm sorry if I got anything wrong as this was written after I had just witnessed the scene where *season 1 spoilers* Euphemia dies in the hospital, I could sense how much they cared for each other. And although I may dislike this pairing; its quite obvious from the way Suzaku shields and how she believed in him; it has come to my attention that this ship may or may not be canon. I really can't say and I'm sorry to my watchers that this isn't yaoi. I might and probably will write a fic on Suzaku x Lelouch (as listed above; my Code Geass OTP) and... I hope you enjoy this. DISCLAIMER: I do not own Code Geass; nor any of the things I write about here on . If I did; I swear there will be yaoi. Lots of it. Now, enjoy the fic! I hope you hetero lovers like it! This was my first straight fanfic I ever wrote; and forgive me if it is OOC. Anyways; I'll just stop rambling and let you carry on with the one-shot!_

_- Jay_

* * *

He loved her he supposes.

The chocolate brown haired knight ponders about his connection to the beautiful pink-haired princess that goes by the name Euphemia Li Britannia; or more simply known as Euphie.

He would never forget her.

The way she had firmly believed in him, how she would jump up at any accusation thrown at him about his heritage. How her smiles seemed so gentle and full of warmth. How much she believed in equality and peace. How soft and lovely she was; her hair a gorgeous light pink that bounced whenever she walked. Her bright and cheery laughter that in turn was the highlight of his day. How her pretty purple orbs were always so full of live and energy; how those amazing purple hues never failed to captivate him.

When he had been crowned as her loyal and faithful knight, he believed he was the happiest person in the world. Now, no one could tear him away from his lady's side. He would always be beside her, protecting her, sheltering her; her safe sanctuary in a world full of bloodshed and spite. Of terrorists and war. Of conflict and false peace.

He vowed to protect her innocence. To make sure those magnificent purple irises would never be tainted from seeing battle wounds inflicted from Knightmares. Of mutilated and mauled men, women and children; battered up and bruised, bleeding to their deaths on the cold _cold _ground.

_Or so he though_t.

The memories had been scarred into his brain; etched deep into the most murkiest parts of his conscious.

It was impossible to forget.

When his beautiful petite crush had given the command to obliterate the Japanese, he had been shocked. Stunned. Absolutely speechless.

This was not the Euphemia he knew.

He had been forced to watch in horror; his emerald green gaze forced to watch as the love of his life declared genocide, commanding the Britannians to kill any living Japanese without hesitation. To not leave a single one alive.

No. This definitely wasn't the fabulous princess he had once known he thought to himself in dismay and disbelief as the blood of his country splattered and stained his pure white and golden coat.

This needed to stop.

He ran across the battlefield; panting and eyes wide with fear. He spotted her sitting on the chair of a Knightmare; her eyes wild and glinted with a light of complete and utter malice which replaced her usual bright-eyed and innocent look. Something he had found much more fitting for those beautiful purple eyes.

He scanned the world below him; frantic to spot any sign of her majesty. _His _majestic, adorable princess who had been changed and altered by war.

His eyes brightened up considerably when he spotted the top of her pink head from the ground and his face broke into a smile.

He was going to make it!

_Until he saw the bullet._

The bullet went straight through her; piercing her gorgeous, lithe figure in a flash; but everything went in slow-motion for him.

As if seeing his princess murdered right in front of him wasn't punishment enough.

His face spread from shock to agony, to pure hatred and to venomous anger as he shot through the sky like a rocket; spiraling down to the blood-stained ground, his face contorted in a nasty look as he screamed in rage.

He doesn't care that the other Knightmare - he cannot bother with names in his hatred - as he blocks the red and black burst of power that shoots straight for him. His shield activates without his knowledge, protecting him from being burned into a brisket.

_But he doesn't care._

He dodges every single shot as if he isn't even away of them. All he knows and can register in his crazed brain is the fact that he had watched as Zero lifted his gun and pulled the trigger.

He had watched the princess die and he hadn't even been there to protect her.

It was _sick._

He kicks the last Knightmare out of his way. Why?! Why can't they just leave him alone and let him tend to his beloved?! Why had it been war - the very thing that the Princess detested - kill her?!

He swoops down to the ground and snatches the limp girlish figure of his princess and dives back into the sky. He leaves the scene in a flash; but he cannot help but notice just how fragile she looked right then.

His green hues darken with sadness and grief; replacing his blistering and over-powering rage.

He can't help but muse over the fact that he had betrayed her.

But all he really knew was that he had failed her, Britannia, and most of all; himself.

He smashes the controls of his Knightmare, Lancelot, his face twisted in all the most horrible emotions one could feel about themselves. Pain, sorrow, sadness, agony, regret, remorse, anger, hatred, bitterness and failure.

After all; what else can one do when he loses everything?


End file.
